Tuesday, January 31, 2012

A Proud Mommy Moment

When you are picking your daughter up from preschool, the last words you want to hear are:

"Mrs. Davis, could I speak to you for a moment?"

So when I heard those words come out of Addie's preschool teacher's mouth a couple of weeks ago, I broke out in a cold sweat. I had to stand there for about 5 minutes, anticipating what she was going to say. Did Addie hit someone? Did she steal a toy from another child? Was she talking about boobies again?

When her teacher pulled me aside, I just blurted out, "What did she do? Just tell me. TELL ME!!!" Okay...I didn't say it like that, but she did see the worry in my eyes and started off gently. She said that Addie is a joy to have in class, she is very mature, knows her manners, is retaining all of the material they are learning, yadda yadda yadda. All great things that I am VERY proud of. But I knew the "But" was coming. And then there it was...

"But, we had a really bad day today. Addie seems to have a lot of trouble focusing. She can't sit still during circle time, has a hard time staying on task, she is very talkative (even during quiet times) and isn't always the best at sharing. She just has LOTS of energy"

I wanted to say, "So like...what you're telling me is that she is acting like a typical 3-year-old?"

But instead I said, "I notice these things at home as well, and my husband and I have been trying really hard to work on them. We even started another sticker chart, since she seemed to be very motivated by that last time".

I mean...what do you really say in that situation? Even though they are talking about your child misbehaving, as a parent you feel like they are talking about you. My cheeks get all red and I immediately start wondering what I am doing wrong. I feel like it's my fault that she had a bad day because I am clearly not teaching her the right way to behave in class.

Addie and I went home from preschool that day and put together a brand new sticker chart. We bought a bunch of new stickers and did some brainstorming about what our rewards would be. Addie's favorite thing in the whole world right now is having sleepovers. I think this has a lot to do with all the spoiling she gets when she it at my mom's or when she's at my MIL's house with Nia.

So that was going to be our weekly reward (thanks to my mom who was willing to keep her once a week). And then, her BIG reward for filling a whole chart is going to be seeing Disney Princesses on Ice. All this has really motivated her the past few weeks. We also do a LOT of talking about listening, sitting still during story time and quiet time (which she still needs work on. She's antsy like me). And of course, learning to share with others. I told her to remember 3 things about sharing.

1. Always ask someone if you can take a turn before grabbing it out of their hands.

2. If the child says "No", make sure you give him/her a little more time and then ask again.

3. If someone is not sharing or if someone takes a toy from you, do not hit, shove, yell or steal the toy back. Let your teacher know and she will take care of it.

I'm not sure if this is all the best advice, but it's what seems right to me.

So today, I had another chance to be the helper in Addie's classroom. I was a little nervous because I find it hard to resist the urge to shout out Addie's name every time I see her doing something wrong. Also, when I am in the room, she sometimes has a harder time focusing on activities because she is more concerned with what I'm doing. But the teachers need parent volunteers and I love being able to do this as a SAHM so I don't want to pass on the opportunity just because of Addie's "focusing issues". So I went in today with low expectations of how her morning might go.

But she TOTALLY surprised me!!! She sat still during circle time, she did all of her projects, she listened when called, and the HIGHLIGHT of my morning was watching her during open playtime.

The teacher told all the kids they would have to be 2-to-a-station for all the activities. I watched Addie take her turn and pass things to other kids. And then there was another station occupied by two little girls. They had been there a while, but Addie went up to them and said very sweetly, "Can I have a turn?" The girls said no because they were still playing so Addie said okay and walked away! I couldn't believe it!!!

10 minutes later, she went back to the girls and asked nicely again for a turn, but sadly the girls still said no.  I was waiting for Addie to get her trademark "mean face" or grab a shovel out of the little girls hand...but she didn't! She walked up to her teacher and told her that she would like a turn at that station. Sadly, the teacher didn't realize the others girls had been on it for a while so she made Addie wait again. But Addie handled it like a big girl.

She has made me such a proud mama today :-)


And because of that, Nana invited her to sleepover tonight too :-)

Great job baby girl!! I knew you could do it. Only a few more stickers until we see the princesses!!!

2 comments:

  1. Way to go Addie!! Keep up the good work momma, you're doing a great job!!

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  2. The thing I observed when I picked Addie up from pre-school last week was that the teacher must be busy talking to EVERY single parent because I saw about 20 other little ones acting JUST like Addie.

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